We’re going to get right to the point here: Why are so many of us willing to accept certain help in some areas of our life – THINK: nannies, housekeepers, grocery services, babysitters, meal-preparation services, personal trainers, on-demand drivers – but grimace, wince and recoil when the suggestion of an assistant comes up?
Is it because we associate that particular help with luxury? Decadence? Laziness? Unaffordability? Socioeconomic status? Is it because we conflate ‘help’ with ‘The Help’ – a lifestyle serviced by subjugation?
Because while the parallels are understandably conflicting, they are also woefully overdrawn and, in many instances, inflated entirely.
We don’t bat an eye at enlisting help to shop for our groceries, get us in shape, clean our homes and even care for our children. We deem it necessary and, as a result, justify it without hesitation.
But somehow, for whatever reason, so many of us simply cannot wrap our heads around why we deserve – a very deliberate word choice – consistent, daily help.
It brings us back to what Megan Hyatt Miller recently discussed on our podcast about striking balance for her Double Win:
“Somebody else can empty the dishwasher. It does not have to be me. My kids will not remember that. They’re not going to look back and say, ‘Man, mom was so good at unloading the dishwasher. Every time I got clean laundry, I just thought about how grateful I was for her.’
“[T]hey’re not going to think that. They’re going to think about the time that I read the story or when I went to the practice or the game or the special trip we took – those like high-quality moments are what they’re going to remember.”
And Megan determines what is worthy of her time – and what isn’t – with one simple question.
“‘Is this really high-leverage?’ And if it’s not, then it’s a candidate for delegation.
“It’s such good advice, especially for women. Maybe you send somebody to get some dry cleaning for you or order lunch, but you’re not really thinking about your personal appointments – you know, all the things that have to do with running your personal life and your home – and those are all candidates for delegation.
“And that’s like a level of magic that, once you unlock it, man, you are really gonna get your life back.”
And all we have to do is recognize that help is everywhere. We just have to give ourselves permission to accept it, knowing we deserve it.
Ready to call in the cavalry? First things first: Congratulations! That was likely not an easy decision to reach. But the good news is that getting started is the easiest thing you’ll do today.