We’ve all met people or heard stories of people who were the best in their field — earned lots of money, helped lots of people, and received lots of praise, but we later discovered that their personal life was in shambles or they were burdened by depression.
Every business leader reading this knows there is a psychological price associated with being in charge. Inc. Magazine once referred to as “the downside of being up.”
In this episode of One Next Step, we learn tips and strategies to make sure your success at work adds to – not subtracts from – your life. We’ll be joined by Anthony Flynn – the founder of Amazing CEO and the CEO of The WorkFaith Connection.
Anthony talks about how to align your career with your life so it adds joy and fulfillment.
Here are some takeaways he shares:
1. You have permission to view success differently.
Anthony left his “dream job” as a C-suite executive at the age of 24 to work in ministry outreach for $25,000 a year.
Why?
He saw the long game. He knew himself enough to know that his idea of fulfillment is helping others.
Even though some people thought he was crazy for leaving that job, he knew that it wouldn’t make him happy.
It’s easy to get caught up in the institutionalized idea of success – big house, big job title, big paycheck – but will that ultimately make you happy?
You have to put your self-esteem in your work ethic and not the end result. If your self-esteem is tied to results, when things don’t pan out exactly as you’ve anticipated or desired, you can become consumed emotionally, psychologically and spiritually.
When you’re spending all of your time trying to get to the result you have in your head, you’re not making time for ambiguity or the people around you.
2. Many people don't put the same level of efforts into their relationships as their professional lives.
How would your personal life change – your relationships with your partner, kids and closest friends – if you put the same level of focus into growing closer to them as you do with succeeding at work?
Ultimately, those relationships matter most, and you’ll never truly be happy without the support of others.
For Anthony, his definition of success is, ‘Am I finishing well with my wife and kids?’
How would you answer that question?
At the end of your life, what do you want to have accomplished? What is important to you?
When you have this goal established, you’ll be able to compare what you’re doing right now with what you ultimately want. Then, you won’t have outside voices that are leading you down a direction and a path that will cause you to say, ‘What are we doing here?’
3. Most people overestimate who they actually are at the expense of underestimating who they can become.
In other words: Is your Instagram self your real self?
Too many people want to look good without doing the work to really look good in real life.
They want to look fit, but are they really exercising? They want to look wealthy but have they really done the work to be professionally successful? They want to look like they have the perfect family and the perfect house, but what do things really look like behind the scenes?
Focus on being authentic, on who you can become, instead of worrying about how you look to others.
History does not have to be a predictor of your future. History can be a lesson. Take that lesson, learn from it and shape your future.
Research reveals that happiness is an elusive thing — but it doesn’t have to be. This episode’s resource is chapter one of The Happiness Map: Finding Fulfillment in Life and Work — a book by Anthony Flynn and licensed therapist, Dr. Emily Shupert.